True Love

 

               By Perom Uch

 

A young man, a college student, age 23 was traveling home during one

of the college breaks.  He boarded a ship that would take him home, a

journey of two days. Shortly after, he boarded the ship, he saw a

girl on the deck of the ship.  Their eyes met and the rest is history.

 

Last June 2nd, the couple celebrated their 35th anniversary.  The

couple of course, I'm talking about are my parents.  Was it love at

first site?  Was it true love?

 

Today, I would like to talk to you about the meaning of true love?

I share with you true love hoping that you'll find this information

informative and helpful in your quest for true love, or helpful in

relationships in your life.

 

In my quest to find true love, I traveled many roads, forded many

streams, asked many questions, and researched the subject many times.

 

I interviewed many people, watched many movies, read many books but

TRUE LOVE has eluded me.  Am I looking in the wrong places? Does true

love happens to just a select few.  Is it just pure chance?  Is there

a magic formula?  Where can I find it?

 

Well, I searched high and low.  I looked everywhere.  I looked at

what  the Egyptians can offer, perhaps I can ask Cleopatra, but that's not

a  good idea.  Well, perhaps the Romans can help, but Caesar, Nero and

Caligula are not good sources either.  Finally, I stumbled into something new. 

I have found TRUE LOVE from an unlikely source, the

ancient Greeks.  Was Athena, the goddess of love involved with this?

I don't know.  The Greeks are a very intellectual people. One of

their  many motto's is, “ Know Thyself. ”

 

To truly understand true love, we have to understand first the

definitions of love.  The Greeks defines love in three different

ways.

 

There are essentially three types of love.

 

Eros, Philia,  and Agape

 

Eros means romantic love in which the word erotic come from.  It's

the  chemical reaction that happens between two people.  It's the spark

that happens to people.  It's the blushing of the face.  It's

infatuation between people.  It's puppy love.

 

It's the most common type of love that we can associate.  When you

see a couple holding hands or kissing and people say, "Yes, they are in

love."  This type of love is called Eros.

 

Most relationships are based on this type of love.

 

The Greeks also has a second definition of love, and that is Philia

in which the word the philanthropy come from.  Philia means brotherly

love.  We all know city of Philadelphia as the city of brotherly love.

Philia does not contain romantic love.  Philia is the love you and I

express to our father, mother, brother, sister, or a friend.  People

say, "I love my brother to death". Well, this type of love is philia love.

 

It does not contain, Eros type of love.

 

The third definition of love is called Agape.  Agape means

unconditional love for someone.  It means loving someone without

expecting love in return.  Parents can relate to this, especially a

mother.  Perhaps this may be a difficult concept in today's selfish

society because this type of love requires sacrifice and selflessness.

 

One common mistake that people make is equating true love with EROS

love only.  I submit to you that TRUE love requires all three types

of LOVE.  Most relationships today are based on one type of love.  If

your relationship does not contain these three types of love, you may

have the recipe for disaster.

 

Trouble looms ahead when the first few years are past, add a kid or

two, and when the going get tough.  When EROS love loses a little bit

of its flavor, most people bail out of relationships.  It's equally

important that individuals apply all three types of love in their

relationships and marriages.

 

EROS love that is key to every relationship, there is the philia love

that's equally important, and of course, agape love that binds all

three.  It's important that we apply all three types of love in

finding true love.  Most marriages and relationships are based on

EROS love only.

 

Love is patient and is kind; love does not envy; love does not boast

itself, is not arrogant; does not behave rudely, is not selfish, is

not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but

rejoices in truth; it bears all things, believes all things, hopes

all things, endures all things.  Love never fails.  That is a quote from I

Corinthians: 13 of the Bible.

 

So I hope you find your quest for true love.  It may be something

that you already have.  In Forrest Gump, the movie, Forrest expresses this

in the famous line, "Jenny, I may be stupid, but I know what love

is."  So, I hope my search and your search is over in finding the meaning

of true love.

 

I would like to leave you with my recipe for true love.

 

Heat EROS in the oven at 350 degrees,

Add a dash of Phila,  Stuff it with Agape love.

Roast it for a lifetime. Serve it hot.

 

 

 

Campbell, California  February 2000

To my lovely and gentle best friend "Neang Thom".

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